Yeah i'm bored. Not just bored enough to think about filling in one of these journal things, but bored in general. Even though I've gone to several exciting ska/punk shows as of late, and I've actually been mostly busy, I'm bored.
I haven't been getting enough sleep.
And I'm getting less tollarent of people. I see less positives. I'm loseing my self confidence.
I suppose the really sucky thing is that in the unlikely event that someone checks out my user profile and looks at this dumb shit they'll get an impression, a first and lasting impression, that THIS is me, THIS is who I am, and this is simply too small of a box to contain all that.
Then again, though my love for deviant art is strong and proud, I realise that there's something very cold about it. It has it's forum, it's got it's ability to communicate. But it's amazing how in all this sheer individuality and all of this blinding creativity, the amazing bell curve of life has made it so dry and cold. One can not help but feel overwhelmed, knowing it's all been done before, and it's been done better. I can't afford a tablet, and I don't have a lot of time on this computer, and i can't compete.
You can't help but feel that there are so many people in this community, and it's overwhelming, and yet it's so lonely. so cold and despondent.
Hell, it's probably just me, probably just tonight.
But I'm lonely. and i don't think i'm the only one.